The neighbor probably wanted to have a small talk, but I instantly got annoyed and felt attacked.

I just moved into my dream home. It was perfect for me; a three-bedroom house near the canals of Leiden with a beautiful terrace. I was single, and I was 39 years old.

Obviously, I responded: “Well, the boyfriend will become husband very quickly; children are on their way. You can imagine that I need to think big. I am not planning to move so many times within the city.”

Around that time, people kept on asking me:
Where is your boyfriend?
Where are the children?
Are you single again?

And it annoyed the hell out of me!
The neighbor was satisfied and said: “Ah, it makes sense. Have a good day!”

I was not! I was not satisfied, because I realized that I had fallen for it again! Where I needed to explain myself and sketch a picture-perfect to someone.

I wasn’t ready for a husband or children because I was busy focussing on my career. BUT still, I felt the pressure and the need to explain myself.

Who can recognize this? What can you do about it?

Eight years later, I found another dream home in Germany with three bedrooms with a husband, a bonus child, and a dog, but no children of my own.

If someone asks me again: “Do you live alone with your husband in that house? ”
My reply would be; Yes, I do! And if they ask me why? I would say BECAUSE I CAN!

I do not need to justify it to anyone!